Carefully begin by folding the bracket along its width, proceed following standard paper airplane instructions and launch it from a rooftop. This is where your bracket belongs.

Failing that, repeat step one above before vigorously (and with at least a measure of unfettered aggression) wadding it up and taking aim at the kitchen waste basket from a distance of roughly 20 feet.

In the event you misfire, opt for a dunk. This is where your bracket belongs.

I've seen my share of Mountain West men's basketball through the years, but not like this, not where the so-called "bottom-half" of the league lies in wait for the heavies like some rec-league ringer sporting polka-dot Vans and a pair of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar signature goggles.

If this is going to be the drill for the MW Championships, I'd wedge myself into a line at your nearest ticket office post haste, particularly those preferring their March Madness with a ladle of lunacy.

In the last week, the Goliaths have gone down faster than the Davids can fill their pockets with rocks, tumbling from their perches like bloated birds. I was convinced I'd seen it all when TCU rallied from 18 points down with less than 15 minutes left to beat then-No. 11 UNLV, but clearly I'd developed a limited sense of imagination.

This misgiving was all but confirmed four days later when Air Force, fresh off the heels of rallying from a 14-point deficit at Wyoming, promptly pocketed its second win in history against a ranked opponent with a 58-56 victory over then-No. 13 San Diego State.

Surely, sanity still existed somewhere. Ah, New Mexico. Seven straight league wins, margins of victory resembling games pairing the Lakers and Floyd's Barber College, Drew Gordon getting to the rim and rebounding anything not anchored to the floor. Certainly the Lobos would help ease my oars back into the water.

And then along comes Colorado State. Now, I would write the biography of Rams coach Tim Miles for free, but the way No. 18 New Mexico was conducting business, I feared that this particular chapter might necessitate utilizing such words as "wolves" (Lobos), "sheep" (Rams) and "slaughter" (slaughter).

Colorado State won, of course, which anyone with a basketball IQ of a ball rack could have foreseen.

Me? I've stopped trying to make sense of it all. I have trouble enough with paper airplanes.

Tickets for the 2012 Conoco Mountain West Basketball championships at the Thomas & Mack Center in Las Vegas can be purchased by calling the UNLV Ticket Office at 702-739-3267 or logging on to UNLVTickets.com. A limited number of all-session tickets remain. Single-session and single-game tickets will go on sale Thursday, March 1. Don't miss out - get yours today!

And while I'm certain that the two of us would find a common bond, perhaps going so far as to form our own mutual admiration society, I fear I would far too often find myself lecturing on the ABCs of the BCS.

Now, let me make it clear that LaMond, who writes for the Fort Wayne (Ind.) Journal Gazette, is far from alone in his confusion. Countless others have come before him, all utilizing the term "BCS" as though every university in America were picnicking together under the same smiley-face umbrella.

Correct: "Alabama beat LSU 21-0 to win the BCS national championship, even though you couldn't have awoken me for the second half with a gong and a bevy of blacksmiths pounding out Kenny Gee songs on anvils."

Incorrect: "College basketball's old guard has grown so weary of routinely being beaten by non-BCS schools that it has retained legal counsel for purposes of obtaining a restraining order."

In the first instance, the term "BCS" refers to football (though that application, too, may soon be rendered passé).

In the second, the term "non-BCS" has no relationship to the BCS whatsoever.

To wit: At this very moment, both of college basketball's top-25 polls --- the Associated Press and USA Today/ESPN Coaches --- include Murray State, Creighton, Saint Mary's, Marquette and Harvard. Given that none of the five is a member of the Football Bowl Subdivision and only Murray State and Harvard actually field football teams, how can they possibly be classified as non-BCS schools?

Meanwhile, the Mountain West remains No. 5 in the latest RPI poll. The MW was ranked ahead of the Pac-10 last year and is once again ranked ahead of the Pac-12 in 2012. By that score, is the Pac-12 now "non-BCS" in terms of basketball? Don't get me wrong, LaMond. I know your Jan. 31 article entitled "3 Non-BCS Contenders," touting the talents of Murray State, San Diego State and UNLV, wasn't meant to rattle my chain. It's just that I get a little testy when folks misconstrue the ABCs of the BCS.

May it R.I.P.

While I've grown increasingly numb to overzealous parents who envision their sons or daughters as superstars, I've hit the end of my tether with agents who convince unwitting and ill-informed college athletes to abandon their books in favor of blind faith.

Is former San Diego State running back Ronnie Hillman making the right decision to enter the NFL Draft? Who am I to say? This much I do know: Hillman's limitations are, well, not exactly limited.

A player who struggled to stay healthy at the college level, the 5-foot-10, 195-pound Hillman is not cut out to run between the tackles in the NFL just yet. His ability to get to the corner will be checked by NFL linebackers and cornerbacks who are equally fast. He was a minimal factor in the passing game and did not return kicks his first two years, an assignment he should have asked to take on next season with the Aztecs had he wanted to find a legitimate spot in the NFL.

Instead, a player that was garnering attention as a possible Heisman Trophy candidate next season has likely become another victim of questionable advice from someone who has placed Hillman's net worth ahead of his best interest.

And then there's the case of Wyoming running back Alvester Alexander, who has convinced himself that he, too, is ready for the next level...

The four new football coaches in the Mountain West --- Norm Chow (Hawai'i), Bob Davie (New Mexico), Tim DeRuyter (Fresno State) and Jim McElwain (Colorado State) ---- have a combined 108 years in the business. All four coaches have great pedigrees and are certain to bring the excitement back to their respective campuses. I have a hunch that McElwain has the makings of a monster in Fort Collins, where the Rams have more --- and better --- young talent than any team in the league.

More than once in the past week, UNLV men's basketball coach Dave Rice has said that he'd have a hard time believing that any guard in the country is playing better than Rebels junior Anthony Marshall. Having witnessed Marshall's performance at San Diego State, where he finished with a game-high 26 points before scoring a career-high 27 four nights later against TCU, who's to argue? Marshall, who averaged 7.5 points his first two seasons, is currently averaging 12.0 points. Topping it off, he's averaging 4.7 rebounds. From a guard?

Nineteen Division I players are currently averaging double-doubles. The Mountain West is one of only two leagues (Colonial League) in the nation to feature more than one --- UNLV's Mike Moser and New Mexico's Drew Gordon.

So, the BCS Presidential Oversight Committee can't find an agreeable time for its members to meet and provide the MW with an answer to its request for a two-year exemption from the BCS? I can never reach my wife on her cell phone, either.

And speaking of the advancement of civilization (no, not the BCS), how does one charter a jet in San Diego for purposes of flying to Laramie, Wyoming, and find it necessary to refuel in Cedar City, Utah and Grand Junction, Colo.? The next time San Diego State's men's basketball team opts to charter, which it will later this season when it visits Boise State, it may first want to taxi over to the Shell station at the corner of Laurel Street and Pacific Highway.

Does the MW deserve to be rated above the hallowed ACC in the latest RPI rankings? Other than holding a 3-1 advantage in head-to-head meetings, a better winning percentage against non-conference opponents and having two teams ranked in the top 15, no. ☺

Former Boise State quarterback Kellen Moore will take part in the 14th annual All-Star Football Challenge, an event staged in Indianapolis on Feb. 5 as part of Super Bowl week. No word on whether competition in something called the FRS Healthy Performance QB Scramble dictates that invitees be at least 6-foot-4 and weigh a minimum of 235. The word prototypical should be stricken from the English language, particularly when it comes to defining athletes.

The San Diego State men's and women's basketball teams, both undefeated in MW play, have won a combined 22 straight, with each having won 11 in a row. I realize that current men's assistant Brian Dutcher has been designated the "head-coach-in-waiting" by current head coach Steve Fisher, but Dutcher may want to consider filling his own spot with women's coach Beth Burns. Trust me, Burns is not someone with whom you'd care to go one-on-one, be it in a basketball game or an interview session. When a former colleague of mine asked for a sit-down with Burns some years ago, she replied, "Bring a change of clothes."

I don't know if hoops guru Jerry Palm uses bats' wings and eye of newt in his bracketology formula, but his latest NCAA Tournament pairings have UNLV as a No. 3 seed in Albuquerque and San Diego State as a No. 4 seed in Portland, Ore. Palm also has New Mexico as being one of the first four teams out. Don't count on it, Jerry. I've seen the Lobos in this position before.